12.17.2007

Random "thots"

I just can't help it. I am a little competitive by nature. Not about all things, and I don't absolutely have to win to enjoy a competition, but I am currently getting shellacked here! What is kicking my proverbial behind you may ask?

My wife! She has turned into a blogging machine and I can't keep up. And it's good stuff! If you haven't read Furiously Loved lately because she hadn't written in so long...do yourself a favor and go there next She's been cranking out one profound post after another.

This is all very well, thank you except that I've always been the wordy one in the family - if you know what I mean. I've always had something to say, and sometimes it's been profound or provocative or, at least fun to read. I've sat down in front of the computer many, many times in the last couple of weeks to write and each time, I've gone blank. OY!

OK - enough of that.

I was very moved Sunday by what my friend and Pastor, Tom, shared in his message. He's doing a series on Matthew 5:1-12, commonly called The Beatitudes. You can hear the messages for yourself on our church's website.

This week's message was centered on Matthew 5:8 "God blesses those whose hearts are pure, for they will see God." (NLT)

I was very convicted by a particular statement Tom made...it went something like this, "You want to know how pure your heart is? Then pay attention to where your thoughts go when you are alone and nobody else is around." That's not a direct quote, and may be a paraphrase, but it's what stuck in my head.

Where do my thoughts go when I'm alone? I have to admit that too often my thoughts go...astray. I am reminded again that I need a Savior and grace and mercy! Wow, I try so hard to follow after God with all my heart, mind and strength. I really do...but if I'm brutally honest, I think I would, at best, get a "C to C+" on my "pure heart report card". I can go off on wild tangents that have nothing whatsoever to do with pleasing my God in a nanosecond.

To my credit, I am much better at recognizing these little jaunts into soulishness and distraction and reigning my thoughts back to reality. And really, that's what I cling to. I absolutely know that my God loves me. I am His child, the delight of His eyes. He doesn't expect, nor demand instant perfection. So I take comfort in the knowing that He has, in fact, factored in my stupidity, my wild hair thoughts and even my imperfect attempts to 'take every thought captive.'

It is good to be a child of the most patient, loving, kind, gentle, merciful Father. I can rest in that, even while taming my random "thots" I think. So as I, may I say...we... wrestle with submitting our thought lives to the Spirit, repenting when we need to, building our faith in Him, and being cleansed by the Blood, we can look eagerly forward to seeing God. Not just in the afterlife, but in the here and now. Not just metaphorically, but really, really see God. I long for that experience of seeing my loving God, whether it is in a vision or dream or some other spiritual context. I want to see Him. I want to know Him.

Purify my heart oh, God and renew a right spirit within me!