Things that make you go,"Hmmmm"

I was privileged to attend a conference this weekend that was chock full of things that made me go, "Hmmmm..." I heard new things about the history of the Hebrew language that fascintated and provoked an intense interest to study more about the ancient pictographic language used before the modern Hebrew alphabet was created. I learned new and interesting things about pursuing intimacy with God and how He can use our loneliness as a catalyst to greater intimacy with Him.

I watched a very gifted man deliver four intense, deep, thought- and spirit-provoking talks with no notes, prompted to by his own depth of study and, more importantly, his own intimate relationship with his Heavenly Father. For hours, I sat mesmerized not by slick delivery or smooth presentation skills, but by a "knowing," deep in my spirit, that this man had paid a great price for this knowledge and intimacy, but he'd paid the dues and could now speak with great authority on the subject. The words he spoke carried an almost tangible weight because of the authority he had to speak. This man knew things from his experience with God that went far beyond the obvious scholarly work he had done. Oh, he'd studied in an academic fashion to be sure, but his depth was not because of knowledge, it was due to his deep understanding.

In my experience with life thus far, I have come to believe that understanding does not come from mere information. I can read and study and know things, but to understand them I have to experience them in some way. For instance, I know a thing or two about computers, as do many of you, but I really know certain programs, like Word and PowerPoint, because I have a depth of experience with them. That understanding allows me to think through odd quirks we run across at work, not from a memory of a certain thing, but an understanding of how many things relate to one another and thus form a more complete picture.

It was the same with Jim Driscoll this weekend. His study was enhanced and knowledge had become understanding because he's done more than just read his bible and study the original language. He's experienced God in very tangible ways that have lent him an understanding of God's ways.

My direction for this year has been "prepare" for greater understanding. This weekend of teaching has given me an even greater hunger to do just that, and now I have a greater sense of how to pursue and get that understanding. Thank you, God, for Jim's example and clarity. Thank you for an inspiration that has led to a direction, that will lead to understanding.

Hero Syndrome :)

My friend, Tom, posted this cool link on his site so I had to go take the test. Turns out I am most like my favorite superhero, SpiderMan. That worked out nicely. :)

So who would you be? Go check it out on the link provided below.

Spider-Man 90% Green Lantern 80% Superman 70% Wonder Woman 60% Supergirl 60% The Flash 60% Robin 50% Iron Man 50% Catwoman 35% Hulk 35% Batman 20%

You are intelligent, witty, a bit geeky and have great power and responsibility.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz

A Life Lived Well...

We attended the funeral of today of someone we've only known for a short time, and primarily through a mutual friend. We didn't know her well, and I am not a fan of funerals...so what compelled us to go?

The love of our mutual friend for this person. You see, we love our mutual friend and whom she loves, we love. Her heart is so big and so generous and so kind, it is impossible to think too ill of someone with whom she is so enamored. No, this wasn't a romantic love. This was love for a woman who lived well.

In her funeral service today, there was an "open mic" sharing time and the theme I heard over and over was that this was a woman who lived life to the fullest. She was a kindergarten teacher, long retired, and the children who had been her students, now grown with children of their own, remembered her as their favorite teacher. Longtime friends, and there were many, remembered that she was as strong and determined as the tide and yet gentle and soft-spoken with a word of encouragement for everyone she met.

We met her as the mother of our friend's "male friend," although I don't think they were officially dating for a couple of years. "Mama" attended some of our house parties. Our friends gather as often as we can to eat too much good food, drink wine we hope is good, and then settle down to play and sing worship songs. Mama had come from a more traditional, hymn-singing church tradition, but the joy on her face and the LIGHT in her eyes were all she needed to communicate that though she may not have known the lyrics, she knew the heart from which they came. She was a worshipper. And she became Mama to all of us in some way.

Today, in a small farming community, so many gathered to pay their respects and honor Mama that they had to set up a video feed and sound in an adjacent building to hold the overflow crowd. She'd touched so many. Hers was truly a life lived well.

We'll miss you Mama. Thank you for your smiles, your laughter, your joy and zest for life. Thank you for loving our friend and loving us with such complete acceptance. May we all learn from this remarkable woman that a kind deed, an encouraging word, and deep love for others are the legacy we should strive to leave behind. May we all live life so well.

Back to Reality...For Real

Yeah...another "coastie" picture - just another beautiful sunset from our balcony at Seaside. This is from the camera in my phone because it's what I had handy - but it's pretty good, I think. I am hooked on sunsets at the beach, but here I am, back in our little home office with freezing temperatures outside and most of a week back at work under my belt.

Could somebody pass the beach reality back this way, please?!?

I have to tell you that without a doubt, I was wired for fun and frolic. I go to work every day and I do my very best because I feel responsible to the folks who make it possible for me to live in a snug little house and eat decent food and enjoy a fair share of gadgets, toys and conveniences. But I cannot say that I am enjoying work at the moment. Parts of it are great - I love teaching classes and working with people to solve their perplexing computer issues. (Yeah, in case you didn't know it, I'm kind of a geeky person. Not a super nerd, but geeky. I love electronic gadgets, but frankly I don't care about the circuits and wiring. I love great design in a gadget, design that makes things easy to use....but I digress) But for the most part, there is a tremendous amount of stress in my work life and I cannot see what the stress is really accomplishing, except to give me headaches and tempting me to buy lottery tickets.

I was thinking about this "wiring issue" again this week back at work. I've long joked that I want to be full time "Minister of Fun." I just know that in this performance-driven, Type-A world in which we live there is a place for learning to how to relax and just enjoy the moment. When we went to Maui, they told us not to be in a rush, but to relax and enjoy "Island Time". I adapted immediately.

I prefer not wearing a watch, for instance. I love just soaking in the experience of whatever I am doing at the moment - watching the waves dance on the beach, talking with friends, sipping a good Syrah (or Cab or Cab-Merlot, or Sangiovese, or Viognier...you get the idea), grilling up a great steak, and most of all, spending time with my bride of 20 years.

I guess what I'm saying is...if there is such a thing as a ministry to people who need to learn to just relax and enjoy life in the moment...SIGN ME UP! That's what I want to do. I have deep desire to see people released from bondage of time and performance. Organization and efficiency and diligence are great - in balance...I am just saying that if you DON'T know how to relax and have fun...we need to spend some time together. Island time. Trust me.

Back to Reality...Almost

Earlier this evening we returned from our annual anniversary vacation. This year we trekked over the mountains and through the woods to Seaside, Oregon. As the name implies it is a beach town. Of the Oregon beach towns with which I am familiar, it is perhaps the campiest - with fun family activities like bumper cars, bumper boats, go-karts and...you guessed it, helicopter rides. Yep, my wife of 20 years and I took our very first helicopter ride on this trip and WOW - was it FUN! Our pilot, Gary, took us on a "low and slow" aerial tour of Seaside over to the neighboring town of Cannon Beach. It was smooth and the visibility was unreal. We could see Mt. Rainier in the distance.

We felt so blessed in so many different ways on this trip. First, on our drive down, we were able to meet with some dear friends who were on their lunch break for a Streams 101 class they were teaching in Portland - what a treat. Hope the class went well y'all! I am sure it did as three of our best were doing their thing there.

Since our check-in time wasn't until 4:00 pm, we took detour (okay, a rather long detour) to Lincoln City and the Tanger Outlet Mall. Now, I have to admit, I am not so into the shopping thing. I am a hunter-gatherer. I like to know exactly what I am looking for, go in to the store, grab it, buy it, bag it and go home. My wife...not so much. So we spent some time (and money) cruising through some shops there. Fortunately, Di was anxious to get to the beach so we only cruised three stores before heading north to our destination.

But a funny thing happened on the way to Seaside. I realized, several miles out of Lincoln City that we were very low on gas and that I'd forgotten all about filling up in my haste to head north. A few miles...okay several miles south of Pacific City (and about 80+ miles away from Seaside), the warning light for our fuel tank came on. Hmmm. Di started studying the map in earnest, calculating how many miles we had in the tank versus how many miles it was to the nearest gas station, which would be Pacific City. I said nothing about it, but I was getting pretty concerned that I was going to be getting some unwanted exercise that night. Fortunately, God was smiling upon us and we pulled up to the gas station with 1/2 gallon of gas left in the tank. Thank you God!

The favor was just beginning. We decided to have dinner (supper for you Southerners) in a microbrewery/pub called the Pelican. We'd eaten there just last October when we'd come to Pacific City with our friends Sam & Diana so we knew this beach side pub offered good eats and really smooth Scottish Ale. So we went in to this normally packed establishment and were promptly seated on the beach side (which is all windows) and were treated to a gorgeous sunset while we nibbled on appetizers and awaited our meal.

Onward, with full tummies and very happy taste buds, we checked into our room around 9:00'ish. Oh, did I mention our room? No? Well, I must fix that now. We are owners of WorldMark, The Club. This is a vacation property club - not timeshare, but similar in some ways in that most of the properties are condominiums. Very nice condominiums. If you're curious, check out http://www.trendwest.com. If you get interested, let us refer you. You'll be glad you did and so will we. :) So, back to the room. We had reserved a space a year ago because we could and because we wanted something very specific...ocean side. Oh, yeah. Our living room and our bedroom had full ocean views. Actually, the other bedroom did too, but we didn't spend any time in there. SWEET!



That's the view at sunset last night. Di was standing at one end of our balcony, I was about in the middle. To my left, on the balcony is a gas grill on which were a couple of fine tenderloin steaks. It was a cool room with an absolutely stunning view. We were on the fourth floor.

Oh...did you happen to notice that I'm outside in a sweatshirt, no coat, in January? Oh yeah, the daytime highs were in the upper 50's to mid-60's and sunny. SUNNY! On the Oregon coast! In January for goodness sakes! WOO HOO! Favor...blessing...and we thanked God for it every hour of every day.

So, we're back home now, and I have one more day of vacation before I head back to work. We're almost back to reality. But I'm holding onto the sweet sound of ocean waves and the smell of fresh sea air as long as I can until we can get back for another fix.

20 Years Ago Today

It's mind-blowing to realize that on this date 20 years ago during a snowy, cold, Friday night my beautiful bride and I exchanged vows and rings, committing ourselves to a lifelong love in marriage. Little did we realize the adventure that lay before us. We just knew that everything would be wonderful along the way.
The funny thing is...for the most part we were right! It has been wonderful all along the way. Believe me when I tell you that our journey has had its share of sorrows, heartbreak and trial. We've had to face hard truths about each other, ourselves and our families that hurt so deeply that at times we thought we would burst.
Through it all, we can look back and say that God truly does cause all things to work together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. He is truly the giver of good gifts, and the most wonderful gift I've been given next to His Grace and salvation is my wife. She well and truly completes me.
There is no doubt that I am a better man for having loved her and known her these 20 + years. She has led me, by example, to new levels of peace and rest in God. Through her loving support I am able to face trials and challenges with more grace. Her love has allowed me to believe that maybe, just maybe, I have something more to offer the world than a quick joke or a chuckle. Maybe, just maybe, God has planted in me the greatness she says she sees in me.
I have such a hard time seeing it for myself, but I love her and trust her and know that God has put her into my life to help me see what I could not see for myself. So I choose to believe, in faith, that she's seeing me with God's eyes and it helps me get through another day when others would tell me that I am not measuring up, that I am a failure, that I can't cut it. The one person on this earth who know me best, my worst and my best, believes in God's destiny for me. She helps me believe I can fly.
Thank you my beloved for seeing through the "funny man" disguise to the sea of love and compassion that swirls within me. Thank you for seeing the me you can love, honor and cherish in the best and worst of times, in sickness and in health, until death parts us...temporarily.
Happy anniversary, my beloved.

Happy New Year, Indeed!

Reading my wife's posting from this morning has inspired me to post my own feelings on this new year. 2006 ended on a tough note, professionally, and 2007 hasn't been much better. I'm old enough to know that "this too shall pass" but it still hits hard sometimes.

Over the last 2 years I've been in a position that has offered challenge after challenge as I've begun learning what being a manager is - at least what is in my organization. I've struggled to learn a rather labyrinthine financial system, among other challenges and the struggle has come at great personal cost.

Finally, in the last couple of weeks, I've had to lay down my desires and just surrender to God's sovereignty as I have come to realize that the situation is not going to improve any time soon. It's just strange and paradoxical to me that when you reach the end of yourself and finally surrender - not just make a truce - but really surrender, that God's peace can just wrap you up and lull you into a sense of protected rest that literally no one can disturb.

WHY do I wait so long to surrender? ARGH! It's not that circumstances are that much better, it's just that I have a total sense of peace because I know that God's got everything under control. I don't understand what He's doing yet, mind you. I just sense His presence around me and it gives me an uncanny ability to sit back and rest in His promise to provide. He IS Jehovah Jireh, after all.

So I am looking at the end of the first full week of the new year with a sense of calm assurance that my God will provide. I have no idea what that provision will look like, but I know He is good and I know that all good gifts come from Him. So whatever happens this year, I know beyond doubt that my God will never leave me, nor forsake me. He has already made my paths straight, all I have to do is keep my eyes on Him and take the steps He directs me to take. No more, no less.

Happy new year!

It's Looking a Lot Like Christmas

Notice that I didn't quote the famous Christmas song...that would just be too easy. But with an early morning dusting of snow, it is looking a whole lot like Christmas is nearly here.

As I mentioned in my last blog, I absolutely love this time of year, and especially because of the beauty I see in my fellow members of the human race - at least the ones I am in personal contact with. Without a doubt this season brings out the best in many, many people, and I am grateful for it.

I was reflecting on this a bit today as we spent the day with my wife's side of the family, at least some of them anyway. Her siblings have managed to produce children who specialize in producing more children, it seems. Visits with the J clan are very crowded, energetic, a bit chaotic and tiring, but always very fun and full of love.

This year, for the first time in a long time, we did not make the trek across the Cascade mountains to the home of her sister, who in years past (due to having the largest house) has hosted the family get-togethers. With siblings, parents, children of siblings and children of the siblings' children we number in the mid-30s. Quite a crowd. But this is a year of transition. Big sister and her husband are trying to sell their house, so we can't be in there making a mess.

So instead, big brother and his wife, along with their youngest daughter and her hubby (and three cute kiddos) made the trek over to our side of the mountains to spend a "Pre-Christmas Christmas" at the home of their eldest daughter (& hubby and three kiddos).

Because schedules are what they are this year, we had a gift exchange this morning for the families present (and in absentia). What a hoot! Monday, all of us will have a traditional Christmas gift time with our own little family units, but this was "THE BIG ONE" for the extended family and a great time. I never tire of seeing the faces of the little ones light up as they open yet another toy and shriek with excitement! Seemingly forgetting the toy they just shrieked about a minute or two earlier.

Yeah. Christmas is all about giving. Our Lord gave us hope for eternal life in heaven by coming to earth in human form - in the most humble and helpless form possible. A baby, born in a manger and wrapped in humble cloth. I still think that gift, which shook the world and which led directly to the ultimate sacrifice that would change the universe, has generated a ripple effect that crosses time and space to touch us all in this season.

I also believe that if we will pay attention and attune ourselves, as some I know have. We can feel it every day of the year. It's the reason people perform random acts of kindness, wait politely in a long line and treat the clerk with a courteous, respectful smile instead of complaining. It's why we choose to prefer others before ourselves. It's why we give. It's why we love. And the cool part is...some of us even know why - so we do it consciously and with purpose - following the example, as best we can, of the ultimate giver of good gifts.

Merry Christmas, and God bless us - every one!

'Tis the Season...

The photo at right is a still image from the new movie, The Nativity Story, which I haven't seen yet, but intend to this weekend. From what I've read it is a pretty faithful account of the birth of Jesus, as told in the Gospels. I can hardly wait to see it for myself.
I've been thinking about the season and the yearly controversy over whether retailers should greet us with "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays." To me, it's not such a big deal because it is a season of several holidays. For me, it's Merry Christmas, thank you.
I love Christmas. There is no denying that something about this season brings out the best in many people.
Oh, sure, there are a few "Scrooges" around, and curmudgeons. There are also people who, through no fault of their own, suffer profound depression at this time of year as it often emphasizes and/or magnifies a loss they've suffered. I feel for them, deeply, and pray for their healing whenever I encounter them. But for the most part this is, as I said before, a season that brings with it much good.
Why is that? I have many extended family members, in my family and through marriage, who don't have a clue who Jesus really is and, frankly don't want to know. But even the ones who most hostile to any mention of God or Jesus find themselves almost inexplicably drawn to acts of generosity and kindness. They find themselves being more patient and kind and so excited for Christmas day, when they can see if they've guessed right and blessed their loved ones with "just the right gift."
Could it be that we are all responding to the spiritual shock waves of the greatest gift ever given, around 2000 years ago? Could it be that the God of the universe, in giving His only Son created such a splash in the time/space continuum that the ripples lift us each year to a higher than normal awareness of the Spirit of giving that emanates from that gift? For it was indeed a magnificent gift, and one that was given by God the Father, Jesus Himself, and the Holy Spirit. A three-fold expression of the ultimate gift by the triune God simply has to have ramifications, don't you think?
I don't really have any answers to this quandary, but I love to think about the mental picture it gives me, an image of huge ocean waves of grace, mercy, kindness, generosity, and love washing through the universe, lifting the the cork of earth upon which we sit and, just for a moment, allowing nearly everyone to experience the joy of giving for the sake of giving.
Merry Christmas, and God bless us, every one!

What's the Buzz?

When I was in high school I was really into sound tracks from Broadway musicals. Not Oklahoma! so much, it was more like Jesus Christ, Superstar and Godspell.

Both of these shows were, and probably still are, highly controversial in the Christian community. They were, after all, extremely secular, different looks at the life of Jesus. But I really liked the music. I played those albums over and over again. Yeah, you read that right. When I was in high school we bought albums - on vinyl, or 8-Tracks or the newest game in town...CASSETTES! Yeah, baby!

Anyway, I was sitting here thinking about the fact that sometimes you just don't what to make of your life. You end up praying prayers like, "Okay, Lord, what is going ON here!" To quote one of the songs from Superstar, we might pray, "What's the buzz? Tell me what's happenin'." And that's precisely where I'm at today. What's the buzz, God? Please tell me what is happenin' so I can do what I see my Father doing. Please show me Your plan - not the whole thing, cuz that would be cheating - just show what I need to do right here, right now.

I don't have that answer yet, and that's okay because the one thing I never question anymore is that God is good and He has got my back. When things are swirling around me and chaos seems to be gaining the upper hand I am learning to just take a step back, pray, breathe, and rest in the arms of my loving, Father, who has everything under control.

Birthdays

What is it about birthdays that make us take stock of our lives. Birthdays and the beginning of a new year has this effect on me every year. I have to tell you that I feel like the most blessed man on God's green earth as I look at turning another year older tomorrow, the 3rd. I have a great life. I am married to the best woman you could hope for. She's kind, loving, smart, just a little mischievous, and beautiful. I have a job that provides well for us and I like the work. I have a safe, warm house, a fun car to drive, and, well...you get the picture.

I just thank God for it all, because it hasn't all been roses, this life. Nope. And, truthfully, it's not all roses now, but with God's help I am learning more every day about seeing His hand at work and taking joy in everything. I am learning the truth of James admonition to "count it all joy, my brothers, when you suffer trials." Getting older and the bones ache a little more, it takes longer to recover from vigorous activity, but you know. I wouldn't anybody anything.

God is so good. And, by the way...I'm turning 48. Yeah.

My Little Window to the World

Those of you who know me well, know that I am an unabashed fan of Macintosh computers and, most things Apple produces, truth be told. I often wonder about this strange turn of events because for years I was an Apple-basher. I would often remark to Mac users, "Get a real computer, will ya!" And now, here I am getting those same snide remarks from my Windows-toting friends. Hmm..

So why did this happen? It really boils down to this, I think. I worked a few years on a PC support Help Desk, answering phones, going out to do hands-on field work to solve software issues and the like. During that period I started "playing" with a Mac. Just to learn something new. No harm in that, right? Boy. I had no idea what trouble I was getting myself into.

I found out what long-time Mac users have always known. For the most part, Macs just work. There is very little you need to do to keep a Mac running in tip-top shape. It's nothing like owning a PC. It's...almost effortless. Now, don't get me wrong. Macs have stuff that goes wrong too, just any man-made machine. They aren't perfect, but they are by far the best marriage of computer hardware and software I have ever had the pleasure of using.

I am writing this on our only home computer, a PowerBook G4. That's a laptop for you PC fanboys. A laptop with a gorgeous 17" widescreen. Sweet. Very much like the one in the picture, except that the picture is a 17" MacBook Pro. One of the new Intel-based Macs.

If you like the "I'm a Mac, I'm a PC" ads the whole collection is found on the link provided above. Enjoy!

Kitchen Project

Where do I start? It's been quite a while since I had both time and inclination to write in this space. I'm not sure why, but I think at least part of it is the busy schedules, both personal and professional, that have contributed to my inattentiveness.

In the time since I last wrote an entry, we have finished the construction phase of the everlasting kitchen remodel. All that's left is to buy a couple of new appliances, which can wait since what we're replacing still works...mostly. ;-) Yep, all the tile is up, the new countertops is done, new sink and new faucet. A new laminate floor replaces the 20+ year-old vinyl flooring that was peeling up. Old cabinets that were stripped to wood and repainted and hung with new hinges and hardware. We also trimmed the doors out in a shaker style with bead board on the bottom doors. You can't see it in this picture, but on the wall opposite the cabinets, we also installed bead board wainscoting and chair rail molding. Looks pretty good, if I do say so. And, no, we didn't do all the work ourselves. We hired pros to do the drywall tape/texture, countertops, sink and fixtures. The rest...we did with the advice and greatly appreciated help from friends who've been there, done that.

We are so happy to have a bright, "new" kitchen to work in. It makes cooking and entertaining our friends so much more pleasant. Next stop...paint the exterior trim. Not terribly impressive, except when you consider we have a two-story house and I have very short arms. Lots of ladder moves and LOTS of climbing up and climbing down. First to prep, then to paint. (A motorized, lift is starting to sound better and better...)

Our next construction project is the upstairs bathroom. Not a huge project, really, just having our tape-&-texture guy come in to repair some "oops" and finish out the new drywall I put up recently. We are toying with the idea of ripping up the floor and replacing it with the same type of tile we put up in the kitchen to warm up the room (with a floor warming unit underneath, natch). We'll replace the sink too, since the current one is cracked.

After that, we will put some additional recessed lights in the already-exposed ceiling of our basement to brighten things up (along with some paint, I suppose). I think we've agreed to call it quits on projects in this house after the basement is done. We are working toward saving up to buy and sell a "flip" now that we've had so much practice and then...a new home of our own. Definitely a rambler. Definitely set up for having our friends over...yes you're invited. :)

Blessings to you and yours.

Tooth and Fang

This post is just for fun! My wife recently had a very strange thing happen to her car. She was visiting a friend who lives in a rural county, up on a small mountain, in northern Washington state. Evidently sometime during the night or morning hours as she was sleeping safely in the house, some kind of critter decided to use her passenger side bumper as a chew toy. I've greatly reduced the size of the images, so hopefully they won't overtax your connection...but I couldn't resist posting all of them.




Is that freaky or what? And no, there was no food being stored in the car.

Summer Saturdays

It's another Saturday - one of my favorite days of the week. My absolute favorite is Sunday, but Saturday is great, too. I love sleeping in and it's my only sleep-in day. I love doing little projects, especially on no particular rush or timetable. I love picnics in the park, to which we are headed this afternoon. I love the relaxed pace of life on the weekends.

You may have perceived it already, but I am definitely not a "Type A" personality. Nope. I am a sanguine. One who, left to my own devices, would spend my days pursuing relaxation and fun. I could very easily slip into "island style" living. If you haven't been to any of the Hawaiian or Caribbean islands, you may not be able to relate to that term. Spending a week or two on the coast regions would give you an idea, but it's not quite the same thing.

There is a deep something in the tropical air that simply begs you to relax, slow down, and enjoy the moment. Simple things like sunsets, the feel of the sand between your toes, the refreshing feel of a warm ocean current - oh yeah. That's the life for me. Yet, here I am in the near-desert climate of southeastern Washington state...and I am content.

I know I can drive for a few hours and be near the Pacific, I've been to Maui and plan to go back as soon as possible. Actually, I could probably live in Maui except for one simple fact. My church, my family and my friends are here. In the end, that's what keeps me here. I love the relationships Di and I have so much that location has become secondary.

Maybe that's a little taste of what Paul talked about when he said he'd learned to be content in all circumstances. The deep intimacy he had with his Maker and with his fellow believers was all he needed. His location and the circumstances became "background noise" that faded into utter unimportance.

What a great place to be.

The End of the Spear

Last night we watched a movie on DVD. We knew the basics of the story, but few of the details. The movie, The End of the Spear, is so powerful. If you haven't seen it, please do so as soon as possible. Buy it. You'll want to see it again and again. Seriously.
I have rarely been so moved by a motion picture. The background for this story is well known to Christians, but is most often told from the perspective of Elisabeth Elliot, Jim Elliot's widow. This movie takes a whole new perspective on an already powerful history. This is more of a story of two boys whose lives become bound by a single event. Without giving away too much of the plot, you see how two lives from completely different worlds intersect and both are changed forever.
I don' t mean this to be a movie review, instead I want to share the way the this movie has touched me. I was startled at the violence of the Waodani tribe. They lived (still live, actually) in a very dangerous place. There are all kinds of critters there who wouldn't mind having Waodoni for a meal, so there's plenty of reason to be fierce and tough. You'd have to be just to survive. What really got to me was that the very thing that allowed them to survive this harsh world became their greatest weakness. They had absolutely no mercy on anyone or anything that harmed one of their own. Thus, revenge killings became a way of life. A cycle of violence that was leading them to extinction.
I was struck by the similarities in our modern world. You can't look at the Middle East closely and not see the same cycle being repeated by the Islamic fanatics who seem to have taken over the culture there. There is absolutely no respect for human life. No boundaries on what they are willing to do to kill in order to satisfy their sense of justice. It's as if the entire culture has gone mad - they seem to have lost the ability to reason. All perspective is warped by the lens of hate so that they seem incapable of even a semblance of civility.
I am left with the amazing realization that Jesus died for such as these. He bore our sins on the cross so that they may live eternally with Him. And He has given we who love Him the commandment to love them. To plead for their salvation before the Throne of God. To intercede for them with compassion and love.
How can we do this? It seems so hopeless and naive. But it is His command and He has supplied the way...He's given us the Holy Spirit and invited us to abide in Him so we can see as He sees, and love as He loves.
A tall order, and it's one that I am still working on...probably for the rest of my life, but I don't see any other options given in the Scripture. How about it folks? Are we willing to pray? Are we willing to go and die if that is our calling?
Watch the movie. It may change your answer...or deepen your commitment to say, "Here I am, send me."

Unity

My friends and I have recently finished teaching a Streams 101 Starter School in a beautiful little town called Goldendale. Smallish town, somewhat isolated and so peaceful. I taught three units this time and in two of them a major theme is unity among the brethren. As I mentioned my last blog I am becoming somewhat obsessed with this idea of unity in the church.
I grew up in a mainstream denomination that, during the 60's and 70's when I was growing up (yes, I am that old Emily ) was wrestling with the idea that God might even be dead. Well, the academics in the seminaries and the "upper tier" leadership were wrestling with it. My mom & dad and our small-town church had no such doubts. There was, I am afraid, a distinct lack of bible training in my Sunday school experience, especially after grade school and almost none when I got high school youth group.
After a relatively brief, but intense period as a hedonist (post high school) I started seeking a relationship with God. I found a bible study that promised to open my understanding of Revelations to me, which excited me. It turned out to be a recruiting tactic for a group of believers who, well, let's just say I couldn't support many of their more emphatic belief structures and let it go at that. Many of the people I met had, I imagine still have, a genuine love for Jesus, so I am not willing to judge them. I just couldn't buy in to the movement so I moved on...to nothing. At least not for a while.
Eventually I found this cool little church just down the street from the rental my new bride and I were living in. They had just hired a new pastor and were so excited to have reached 100 people attending a couple of weeks in a row. Yep, a small church in a cinder block building, much like the one I grew up in. This church however, centered everything they did on the bible. Learning to live every day by the Word of God. That was what their sign said, and it was true. What a great bunch of sincere God-loving, people. This was no fire breathing, get-saved-or-die-tomorrow church. These folks were warm, loving, and it was a place of healing and growth for us. My wife became a Christian shortly after we started attending and life was very, very good.
The church grew. And grew. We built a new sanctuary, converting the offices to Sunday School rooms and offices. We built additional square footage for Sunday School space and almost by the time it was built, we had outgrown our "new" building. So we rented a nearby school auditorium. Adults met for two services there, while the kids took over the entire facility - and it grew.
Eventually the green light was given to begin building a huge (by our community's standards, anyway) new church. And a funny thing happened. During that building project, my eyes were opened to a realm of Christianity I hadn't known existed. Through a series of events one could only say were God-directed (for they are too strange and convoluted to be of human invention) I became aware that the little voice in my head that I had heretofore called intuition might just be God speaking to me.
Now THAT freaked me out, as it may be freaking some of my friends from that church out, but hang in there for a bit while I explain. You see, I began to experience a new intensity when I prayed. When I really listened to that voice while praying for people, words would spill from my mouth that directly addressed a situation or issue in that person's life with such accuracy that they often have a physical and/or emotional reaction. What was strange to me is that there was absolutely no way I could have known about that situation or issue in the natural course of events. It was uncanny..and yet it brought emotional healing, comfort and/or encouragement, so I am sure it was God. The fruit was good (see Matthew 7:17-19).
And that led to my leaving that wonderful church. I still love that church, but it didn't support my newfound experience. The leaders subscribed to something called dispensational theology. I wasn't really sure what that was, nor am I entirely sure I understand it now (I plan to make a study of it in the upcoming weeks or months), but I do know that all of sudden I didn't fit into their mold. I was something of a freak. No one was rude about it. You must understand, I was not treated badly. People just weren't sure what to do with me. My definition of what God does and will do had changed into something that didn't fit. Theologically correct or not, I knew what I was experiencing was real and it was God. I had to go. Fortunately, I was called to go to someplace rather than just leave someplace.
I was called to help plant a new church, Desert Rock Fellowship. We were modeling this new church to be an independent, evangelical, charismatic church. We were inspired by a book called The Word and Power Church by Douglas Bannister. This was the pastor of a large evangelical church who had to deal with a supernatural experience in God, and how he lead this large church into an acceptance, no, an embrace of the flow of God's Spirit in their church. It fit who our core group of pioneers were, mostly ex-Baptists who had experienced too many of the supernatural aspects of God to accept the conventional wisdom that the spiritual gifts died with the last apostle.
And now, through circumstances beyond my control, I find myself in another small church, the Three Rivers Bridge Christian Fellowship (and it's only that short because they ran out of relevant adjectives ). As you might guess we simply call it The Bridge, not to be mistaken for the local tavern of the same name. :) I find myself pursuing certification to teach courses from a ministry founded in the prophetic, learning to interpret dreams by the Spirit of God, and then taking that experience to the street to give the lost a "God touch" of love and encouragement, and guess what. It's awesome!
It's more than a little strange sometimes, but always strange in ways that bring us closer to Jesus. Creativity has been released in new ways and is actively sought out. New paintings, sketches, dances, sculptures, songs, and yes...blogs have found life because of this enthusiastic embrace of the creative spirit of our Creator!
So how does all that relate to unity? Simple. I've come to understand that many in the body of Christ take great delight in trashing the reputations and doctrine of those with whom they disagree. The internet abounds with with I call "Gatekeeper" websites, inviting anyone and everyone to participate in the public denunciation of any doctrine with which the orthodoxy had declared unsound. I've read books that trash the Charismatic movement because of emotional excesses that left out solid doctrine. Guess what. That happened, unfortunately. And guess what else. God is a God of GRACE. He forgives. He loves. He corrects first in gentleness and only when we willfully, stubbornly refuse to change does he correct us more sternly. In many case, by withholding a measure of His protection around us, allowing us to suffer the natural consequences of our foolishness.
My plea is this. Brothers and sisters, whether you believe in the current operation of the Spiritual gifts or not...LOVE ONE ANOTHER. Stop the backbiting, snide, mean-spirited criticism of your fellow Christians. Just stop it. Take your complaint with your brother's doctrine to the Judge and let Him sort it out. Do you not believe that God is big enough and sovereign enough to correct His church? If not, your God is too small. The truth is that He is more than big enough to correct those who are out of line. Let Him do it. Let's concentrate on fulfilling Jesus command to love one another so that the world might know we are His. Wouldn't all that energy be better spent on loving and winning the lost?
Think about it. Search the Scriptures. I think you'll find that the keepers of doctrine were more often than not the Pharisees, who missed the whole truth of who Jesus was because they were so busy jealously guarding the word, when the Word, stood before them in the flesh.

Restoration

Restoration has been on my mind a lot lately. Maybe the fact that we've been restoring and remodeling our old house for the last few years has influenced me. Yeah, probably. But there is much more on my mind than a newer looking kitchen (uh, yeah the year-long kitchen remodel is finally drawing to a close...picking out, and putting up the tile backsplash is all that's left - whew).

Actually, I really got on a restoration frame of mind when listening to an awesome young man preach a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, you know him. One of the things that really stood out to me was his uncommonly good common sense about dogma. I was totally captured by the idea that we believers in Christ are absolutely horrible at loving one another with His grace. Just to be clear, that's not what Jason said, it's the thought I had when he talked about Matthew 7:1 - you know the verse, "Do not judge..."

Wouldn't it be cool if the body of Christ could all just get along? I am not advocating that everyone meet in the same building with the same style of worship and same service. No, no, no. Keep your identity and power to you. I just want not to be judged for how I choose to worship, dress, express my beliefs. That's all. I am not telling you you have to believe every word I speak, I am simply asking you to listen with the same grace Jesus gave to His disciples.

Think about it. Jesus' closest disciples, the 12, had all kinds of screwy ideas about who He was, what He was about and were in a near constant state of amazement at His radical ministry. Yet He corrected them with love, mercy and grace. Even when His words seemed a little harsh, there was such love behind them that instead of being angry they simply repented and came around as best as they could.

Wouldn't it be great if "charismatic" or "evangelical" or "Pentecostal" stopped bringing with them all kinds of baggage and criticism by those who consider it their sworn duty to be gatekeepers of the truth? Don't the gatekeeper websites and books sound an awfully lot like the Pharisees of Jesus day? They too, were the learned religious scholars of their day. And they completely missed the day of their visitation.

Let's not miss it, shall we? Let's build bridges of love and grace and leave the tired old dogma behind.

Just Thinkin'

I am guessing that everyone who reads this blog knows me at some level or they wouldn't be here. With that in mind, I feel the freedom to spend a little time just downloading my thoughts here, whether it's profound thinking or not. I know there is love and abundant grace and for that I am eternally grateful.

I've been reading and doing my prep for an upcoming course I am teaching, 101 - The Art of Hearing God developed by John Paul Jackson and Streams Ministries. I love this course. I love the way it changed my life and the way I see it changing the lives of those to whom I've had the privilege to teach it. This will be, God willing, my last Starter School. For those who aren't sure, that means that I am a "Teacher Trainee" so I teach classes for which no tuition is charged, although the Student Notes must be purchased to take the class. It's a great way to take the class at less expense and an equally great way to learn how to teach the class. Everybody wins...most of the time. :)

One of the things I like to do to prepare is listen to CD's of John Paul teaching the first Teacher Training and hearing the deep insights for why a particular topic is emphasized and when this insight came to him, and how the Lord has worked in his experience to reveal the principles, concepts and actions presented in the course. There are such gems of truth in this material. Such profound insight. Yeah, I love it. I love it because every time I review the material I see something that hits home. I do a lot of repenting and clean up when I study to teach this course. Wow, the material is convicting.

It is also edifying and encouraging to note that everyone struggles to follow God well. Everyone. I love God with all I am and yet I find myself struggling to keep my appointments with Him. I struggle sometimes to make time to just "sit at His feet and listen" as Mary did when Jesus visited her house. In the past, I've been prone to beat myself up pretty badly over my lack of discipline, and sometimes I still do, but I am getting over that. One of the most freeing concepts I've ever gotten hold of is that God is into progress, not performance. I love the phrase (thank you Jim Driscoll), "We need to learn to get good at doing things badly."

It's not that I purposely go out of my way to do things badly, just the opposite in fact. I strive for excellence in all that I do. But the idea I've caught hold of is that like the kind, gracious, loving Father He is, God loves me just for trying to follow Him well, whether I am a stunning failure or a smashing success. He loves me for loving Him enough to try. There's FREEDOM in that concept. Grab it!

So here's to doing things badly (like writing a coherent blog entry). Go forth and fail...or succeed...but go forth!

Stick to Your Ribs!

Ah...nothing like the taste of ribs that are cooked just right! Can you guess what I had for dinner tonight? :)

Yep, I am sitting here, hours after the fact, basking in the warm glow of a huge beef ribs dinner and you know, I can't think of a single profound thought to record. So here's my first "throwaway" blog...well if you don't count my first blog when I found myself unintentionally creating a blog in the first place. ;) We had dinner with my wife's mom and her husband to celebrate my Mother-in-law's birthday, which happens to be tomorrow, the same day as my sons. What are the odds?

Happy birthday Jan and Branden!

Have you ever wondered what makes something funny? I don't mean just a little funny, I mean universally, rib-splitting, gut-busting funny. Guffawing, snort-inducing, hold your gut and shed tears funny. Me too. There seems to be a pattern to things that make us laugh. Playwrights, screenplay writers, and a few stand-up comics seem to have figured it out. There are body language cues, there specific types of movement in an area, facial expressions, and spoken language. For instance, have you ever noticed that clowns...well trained ones anyway...always move in circular, rounded movements? Hah, I didn't think so! Why is that? Well, that one I actually know the answer to. It's because straight lines aren't funny - they are commanding, so they are used to show aggression. Rounded paths to a destination are "soft" and therefore more likely to be funny and put an audience at ease. It's hard to laugh when you're tense.

I have no idea why I thought that was important enough to share with you, but there ya go.

Blessings...and remember, if you want to be funny walk in circles! :)